It has been a long while since i logged into blogger. Then, I was still thinking, "he loves me or he loves me not". And now, we are walking hand in hand, with our hearts entwining and spinning magical moments.
"When pple are in love, they tend to do silly stuffs together"... well, it cant be more true. I didn't think it was possible initially but everything seems to work itself out, like a fairy tale coming true. I'm falling in love, very much in love with this man.
Hmmm... how should I describe this feeling? Magical? yes...but too unbelievable... er... like coffee tasting? Addictive & only the pple who are into it appreciate its bitterness, acidity, and rich fragrance. Har, talking bout addictive... I remembered asking him what flower could best describe me... he said poppy - Addictive.
Wish us all the best.
From da witch.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Monday, July 7, 2008
Happiness
These few days have been the sweetest... no matter what sort of stuffs i'm working on... it's sweet.
Have been all cheery at work thou in a stressful situation. Smiling at the smses that I have received.. even if there's no sms... thinking of you is enough to add a smile to my face.. guess i haven't been that smiley all my life. I used to tell myself, there really aint things to be happy or smiley abt.. but now... it's really different.
In the midst of all these happiness, there's a question in my heart... "Dear God, is this an angel that you have sent or yet another test of my endurance and strength?
Guess the fear to be hurt is still deeply engraved that I could yet to trust another. I wanted to trust you but I held back. Perhaps time will reveal all to me.. and heal my wounds. Perhaps.
No matter what lies at the end of the rainbow, thank you.
Have been all cheery at work thou in a stressful situation. Smiling at the smses that I have received.. even if there's no sms... thinking of you is enough to add a smile to my face.. guess i haven't been that smiley all my life. I used to tell myself, there really aint things to be happy or smiley abt.. but now... it's really different.
In the midst of all these happiness, there's a question in my heart... "Dear God, is this an angel that you have sent or yet another test of my endurance and strength?
Guess the fear to be hurt is still deeply engraved that I could yet to trust another. I wanted to trust you but I held back. Perhaps time will reveal all to me.. and heal my wounds. Perhaps.
No matter what lies at the end of the rainbow, thank you.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Cocktail
Cocktail.. is like a glass of mixed feelings... I dunno why... I just couldn't pull myself out of this.. I know it's not love cause it's not mutual... and we are only friends. I kept asking myself... how many times have we met, how many times have you talked to him, how many times have you msn with him, how much do you know abt him, how long have you know this guy?
All the answers are telling me... no... it's not love silly gal... you fall for someone TOO easily.. way too easily.
Yet, I look forward to chat with him, I look forward to receive his sms, I thought of him... I smile jus looking at his sms. What's wrong with me.. It has come to a point whereby I have to literally remind myself what he has said.. He just want to be friend and we are just friends. I had a hard time convincing everyone else...because I couldn't even convince myself.
I dun wish to lose a friend. And yet i did something silly... so silly to tell him abt this. I told him to stay a distance, I'm afraid that all these sms wld mix up all my thots. I told him abt this blog...
Can we still be friends?
All the answers are telling me... no... it's not love silly gal... you fall for someone TOO easily.. way too easily.
Yet, I look forward to chat with him, I look forward to receive his sms, I thought of him... I smile jus looking at his sms. What's wrong with me.. It has come to a point whereby I have to literally remind myself what he has said.. He just want to be friend and we are just friends. I had a hard time convincing everyone else...because I couldn't even convince myself.
I dun wish to lose a friend. And yet i did something silly... so silly to tell him abt this. I told him to stay a distance, I'm afraid that all these sms wld mix up all my thots. I told him abt this blog...
Can we still be friends?
Saturday, July 5, 2008
him....
Today I met someone in pink (that was according to him, I thot it was orange). Hmm... i was nervous and very.... that I couldn't even remember wat colour he was wearing. I was worrying abt how was I looking.. do I look alright... Awww... it was like i'm close to trembling.. and yet have to maintain my composure. Why was I trying to impress... haiz.
Like he mentioned, we are just friends.. there's a maybe in his answer but for now.. please stop dreaming. I fall in love too easily.. or is it a crush rather than to use the word love, which is meant for something much greater than this.
Our first meeting was short but yet something to remember... he saw me leaving my work place from far... I was told that he was at the Challenger looking for a camera when he saw someone resembling me... and took a closer look.. I'm still wondering, how did he manage to do that? My head was facing down... looking at my phone...
Then I saw his missed calls.. I called back and we met at the train station. He bought me chocolates, what a sweet impression. He looked young.. so young in my eyes... but I was reminded not to mention anything abt me being old... we took train together...though it was a mere 15mins at most.. it was unbearable.. not bearable as in the bad way.. but the awkwardness.. we were simply finding topics to clear the air... and like I mentioned.. "perhaps I'm too old for this"...
His first impression of me? Pleasant disposition... doesn't that mean...I dun look pretty but... my character and personality was pleasant? I read too much.. just look on the bright side of life.
So much for the first meeting... Arh.. dun be silly my girl.. you were smiling head over heels.. be frens first. And the inferiority complex just makes things worst. But I do look forward to his msges... yet worried to be imposing. I 'm also worried that this might after all just be a dream that i wld have to wake up to, one day.
He painted rainbows in my picture, telling me that i'm like it.... a beautiful thing after the thunderstorm... perhaps the most beautiful descriptions I've heard.
Leading a life of Simplicities is the only way to happiness... I will leave this to fate. I wonder will he ever chance upon this one day and once again think of me?
Like he mentioned, we are just friends.. there's a maybe in his answer but for now.. please stop dreaming. I fall in love too easily.. or is it a crush rather than to use the word love, which is meant for something much greater than this.
Our first meeting was short but yet something to remember... he saw me leaving my work place from far... I was told that he was at the Challenger looking for a camera when he saw someone resembling me... and took a closer look.. I'm still wondering, how did he manage to do that? My head was facing down... looking at my phone...
Then I saw his missed calls.. I called back and we met at the train station. He bought me chocolates, what a sweet impression. He looked young.. so young in my eyes... but I was reminded not to mention anything abt me being old... we took train together...though it was a mere 15mins at most.. it was unbearable.. not bearable as in the bad way.. but the awkwardness.. we were simply finding topics to clear the air... and like I mentioned.. "perhaps I'm too old for this"...
His first impression of me? Pleasant disposition... doesn't that mean...I dun look pretty but... my character and personality was pleasant? I read too much.. just look on the bright side of life.
So much for the first meeting... Arh.. dun be silly my girl.. you were smiling head over heels.. be frens first. And the inferiority complex just makes things worst. But I do look forward to his msges... yet worried to be imposing. I 'm also worried that this might after all just be a dream that i wld have to wake up to, one day.
He painted rainbows in my picture, telling me that i'm like it.... a beautiful thing after the thunderstorm... perhaps the most beautiful descriptions I've heard.
Leading a life of Simplicities is the only way to happiness... I will leave this to fate. I wonder will he ever chance upon this one day and once again think of me?
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Gardening...
It will be familiar to everyone who used to visit MIRC....ASL? Then what's your hobby? What do you do during your free time? Etc... These are the norm introduction that everyone begins with, regardless in the virtual or realistic world. Was also one of the favorite composition topics during my time.
My answer: Gardening.
I used to like swimming, reading, shopping, listening to music and collecting phone cards.... I still love them. But my main focus has been shifted to gardening lately.
Reason? The plants kept me alive.
Whenever I tell someone that I love gardening and that I have 18 pots of plants in my balcony, you should look at their expression! It's like as if gardening is the weirdest thing to do on earth. But true, it is rare for youngsters nowadays to like gardening as compared to clubbing, chilling, water sports, etc. With all the excitement out there, gardening seems a tad boring.
Granny loved gardening and she had "green fingers". Needless to explain further, gardening serves a remembrance of her and thus kept me alive. They are the only so-called living things apart from my family members who are seldom home.
I will devote at least 15-30mins of my time daily on watering, fertilising, re-potting or propagating the plants... sometimes chatting and feeling them... somehow I just felt that my presence and appreciation of them wld enhance their growth.. to me.. they're my frens.. I listen to them as well as to talk to them. That's me... you may think that it's weird.. har?
This is how much I commit to a hobby. And it has become somewhat my responsibility...
My answer: Gardening.
I used to like swimming, reading, shopping, listening to music and collecting phone cards.... I still love them. But my main focus has been shifted to gardening lately.
Reason? The plants kept me alive.
Whenever I tell someone that I love gardening and that I have 18 pots of plants in my balcony, you should look at their expression! It's like as if gardening is the weirdest thing to do on earth. But true, it is rare for youngsters nowadays to like gardening as compared to clubbing, chilling, water sports, etc. With all the excitement out there, gardening seems a tad boring.
Granny loved gardening and she had "green fingers". Needless to explain further, gardening serves a remembrance of her and thus kept me alive. They are the only so-called living things apart from my family members who are seldom home.
I will devote at least 15-30mins of my time daily on watering, fertilising, re-potting or propagating the plants... sometimes chatting and feeling them... somehow I just felt that my presence and appreciation of them wld enhance their growth.. to me.. they're my frens.. I listen to them as well as to talk to them. That's me... you may think that it's weird.. har?
This is how much I commit to a hobby. And it has become somewhat my responsibility...
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Tooth Extraction
After searching through several websites and making numerous calls with the assistance of my colleagues and friends...
Finally, I went to the dentist at Alexandra Hospital on Monday, 16 Jun 08. It can be quite ridiculous how some of the clinics function. Even after telling them that I'm in a traumatic pain and needed urgently to see a dentist, the reception goes... "there's nothing I can do, the earliest appointment is next week for consultation only, no treatment on the day itself." When asked when can I actually book an appt for treatment: "I don't know, our dept only handles consultation appts." WHAT THE????? I was in pain!!! Waiting till next week is already impossible after feeding on pain killers for many days and the sleepless nights waking up to the pain! The worst part is the service ethics of these pple! At least, they could have sound sympathetic even if they could not expedite my appt.
Luckily, Alexandra Hospital is nice enough to allow walk in and their service standard is great. I only waited for a mere 20mins. Oh, they are also listed as one of the lower priced dental clinics! Kudos!
Got an X-ray, consultation, some decision making process, 3 painful anesthetics jabs (Again!!!) and extracted the molar in front of the wisdom tooth.
It was after some twist and turn and pull and push that the tooth finally came out. The dentist kept telling me to breathe softly through my nose and to relax my tongue... thru out the most unbearable 30mins. Somehow, I felt like i had just went through a process similar to giving birth... was given my tooth in a zip lock bag to bring home. Everyone went Yekkkkkkk.... when they saw it. Haha! It was indeed big and ugly.
Felt funny now with a tooth missing.... not too bad for appearance wise as you can't really tell the difference, but the rest of my teeth felt weak due to the soreness of the gums... there wasn't much of choices. If I were to keep the molar, I will have to go thru root canal and crowning of which costs 1k++ and 4 treatments and lots of pain!!! So I opt to remove it.
And guess what? I had prata today. Was craving badly for it. Haiz, it is always the case! When I can't eat, I feel like eating everything, and when I'm able to, nothing seems interesting. Contradictory.
Have to go back for a review to determine whether or not to remove the wisdom tooth. Arh... that's again lots of pain to endure. So much for a beautiful set of teeth.
Finally, I went to the dentist at Alexandra Hospital on Monday, 16 Jun 08. It can be quite ridiculous how some of the clinics function. Even after telling them that I'm in a traumatic pain and needed urgently to see a dentist, the reception goes... "there's nothing I can do, the earliest appointment is next week for consultation only, no treatment on the day itself." When asked when can I actually book an appt for treatment: "I don't know, our dept only handles consultation appts." WHAT THE????? I was in pain!!! Waiting till next week is already impossible after feeding on pain killers for many days and the sleepless nights waking up to the pain! The worst part is the service ethics of these pple! At least, they could have sound sympathetic even if they could not expedite my appt.
Luckily, Alexandra Hospital is nice enough to allow walk in and their service standard is great. I only waited for a mere 20mins. Oh, they are also listed as one of the lower priced dental clinics! Kudos!
Got an X-ray, consultation, some decision making process, 3 painful anesthetics jabs (Again!!!) and extracted the molar in front of the wisdom tooth.
It was after some twist and turn and pull and push that the tooth finally came out. The dentist kept telling me to breathe softly through my nose and to relax my tongue... thru out the most unbearable 30mins. Somehow, I felt like i had just went through a process similar to giving birth... was given my tooth in a zip lock bag to bring home. Everyone went Yekkkkkkk.... when they saw it. Haha! It was indeed big and ugly.
Felt funny now with a tooth missing.... not too bad for appearance wise as you can't really tell the difference, but the rest of my teeth felt weak due to the soreness of the gums... there wasn't much of choices. If I were to keep the molar, I will have to go thru root canal and crowning of which costs 1k++ and 4 treatments and lots of pain!!! So I opt to remove it.
And guess what? I had prata today. Was craving badly for it. Haiz, it is always the case! When I can't eat, I feel like eating everything, and when I'm able to, nothing seems interesting. Contradictory.
Have to go back for a review to determine whether or not to remove the wisdom tooth. Arh... that's again lots of pain to endure. So much for a beautiful set of teeth.
Monday, June 9, 2008
A Trip to the Dentist
Went to the dentist today after an intense toothache. Neva had a toothache that bad, was jumping in pain, and tears kept streaming. Tried pain killers and cold pack treatment but was in vain. Managed to survive till the next morning.
Was confirmed that all these pains were caused by the stupid tooth (wisdom tooth actually). It has grown slanted and has caused food particles to be stuck in the gap formed with the front tooth, thus decay occurs. The only option is to remove the wisdom tooth surgically. After the local anesthetics which hurts really badly (three injections into your gums and cheeks), the dentist explained the possible risks pertaining to the surgery. I freaked out totally. It sounded really horrible and scary though it is just a tooth extraction. There are risks of perm nerve damage, cuts to the tongue and lips, excessive bleeding, tooth bits lodging in the throat, etc...
AND for these torturing pains - 6 hundred bucks. Goodness.
Without the extraction, the pain came back several days later, and almost everyone is telling me to extract the tooth asap. Ouch! Have been feeding on pain killers almost everyday. Finally, managed to pick up my courage and book an appointment with National Dental Center. My frens said that it is cheaper and of course, safer. Hmm.... Was advised that I would have to be on 5 days MC because of the swelling that might occur. OH, bao bao face, haiz.
Hopefully the pain will be gone after the surgery. It's too disturbing. Cant help but wonder, how troublesome and tormenting to be a human being. Why animals do not have to brush their teeth like twice a day and yet dun have such problem. Haiz. God's creation.
Was confirmed that all these pains were caused by the stupid tooth (wisdom tooth actually). It has grown slanted and has caused food particles to be stuck in the gap formed with the front tooth, thus decay occurs. The only option is to remove the wisdom tooth surgically. After the local anesthetics which hurts really badly (three injections into your gums and cheeks), the dentist explained the possible risks pertaining to the surgery. I freaked out totally. It sounded really horrible and scary though it is just a tooth extraction. There are risks of perm nerve damage, cuts to the tongue and lips, excessive bleeding, tooth bits lodging in the throat, etc...
AND for these torturing pains - 6 hundred bucks. Goodness.
Without the extraction, the pain came back several days later, and almost everyone is telling me to extract the tooth asap. Ouch! Have been feeding on pain killers almost everyday. Finally, managed to pick up my courage and book an appointment with National Dental Center. My frens said that it is cheaper and of course, safer. Hmm.... Was advised that I would have to be on 5 days MC because of the swelling that might occur. OH, bao bao face, haiz.
Hopefully the pain will be gone after the surgery. It's too disturbing. Cant help but wonder, how troublesome and tormenting to be a human being. Why animals do not have to brush their teeth like twice a day and yet dun have such problem. Haiz. God's creation.
Sunday, June 8, 2008
The first post
This is the countless first post that I have started with, and well apparently I jus couldn't continue with the prev blogs I have set up. All of them end up in the delete or ultimately, trash folder.
Perhaps it's my uninteresting life. I lead an almost meaningless life, slaving for the money master as everyone else. A daily routine filtering btw work and home. There are many a times I've told myself to get back on track but I jus couldn't do it. Everything that has once filled my life with love and laughter was gone and neva shall be replaced. The only person I truly gave my wholehearted love to and the only animals or rather pets that I loved. Whatever left is jus an empty soul with a broken heart.
I could no longer love. My heart has fallen asleep, too tired to love, too afraid of lost. There's simply nothing I looked forward to other than hoping and praying everyday for the happiness and health of the rest. I knew no one is going to live forever, and yet I couldn't bear the pain of losing one who is so dearly to me. And that's my granny. I have told God that should he needed to remove someone from my life again, may that be me. I don't know if there will be one day, where I will hope to live for another, but not for now.
They were telling me to let go of the unhappiness, to treasure those who are still around, to move on. They who do not understand the searing pain. They who did not went thru the sleepless nights, they who did not have wet pillows. The pain was sharp, piercing thru your heart, forcing tears out of your eyes.
I gave up explaining to anyone.
Perhaps it's my uninteresting life. I lead an almost meaningless life, slaving for the money master as everyone else. A daily routine filtering btw work and home. There are many a times I've told myself to get back on track but I jus couldn't do it. Everything that has once filled my life with love and laughter was gone and neva shall be replaced. The only person I truly gave my wholehearted love to and the only animals or rather pets that I loved. Whatever left is jus an empty soul with a broken heart.
I could no longer love. My heart has fallen asleep, too tired to love, too afraid of lost. There's simply nothing I looked forward to other than hoping and praying everyday for the happiness and health of the rest. I knew no one is going to live forever, and yet I couldn't bear the pain of losing one who is so dearly to me. And that's my granny. I have told God that should he needed to remove someone from my life again, may that be me. I don't know if there will be one day, where I will hope to live for another, but not for now.
They were telling me to let go of the unhappiness, to treasure those who are still around, to move on. They who do not understand the searing pain. They who did not went thru the sleepless nights, they who did not have wet pillows. The pain was sharp, piercing thru your heart, forcing tears out of your eyes.
I gave up explaining to anyone.
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